Certain days of hard and stressful work I felt myself sad and demotivate; I kept finding myself staring at the table calendar, full of sea landscapes situated on my desk, imagining me to appear on the picture..
I cannot find words able to explain the feeling of absolute happiness that I lived on my first day at the beach, just arrived on "my" island.
It didn't seem me true; I slipped in and out of the water (a little bit cold telling the truth) and those "purifying baths" given back to me tons of enthusiasm that I thought were gone lost forever.
But just after 10 days of ablutions my brain, used to study and work hard for over 35 years, starts sending me worrying messages:
"And now? What do we do? The day is long, must do something constructive! Cannot waste time!".
In a few
words I felt me as a beached whale, I almost suffocated out of my natural
How is precious than discover my real essence? What is it more valuable than to become "manager of my time?"
Nothing compares to the successfully feeling of being able to decide how - and above all with whom - spending my own time.
The days following my arrival here were been exciting, but also extremely challenging because I completely underestimated the effects of the "kick back " of my choice.
I spent more than 3 months to get used to my new rhythms and to become the happy girl appearing on the image of the table calendar.
Now I learn to appreciate the marvellous opportunity to spend every day with those who matters, taking care of my health, my passions and my talents.
But don’t you think that it has been easy: I learn to appreciate loneliness and how managing the enormous and precious heritage of days with no appointments, with no duties.
I know people filling their days just to avoid a single minute of spare time: they live perpetually pursued from the clock and, even complaining about that, after all they are proud to define themselves "victims of labour." And really none of them is President of the United States or Pope, on the contrary they are simply employees like I was.
Being always super busy allows many people to legitimate themselves, to show their own utility, and perhaps also to exorcize loneliness.
If you doesn't fall in love with yourself, if you are not independent from other people's judgments and from the external conditionings, you’ll be finding yourself loosing your time, sometimes so scared to be alone to stand with wrong people, or doing unless things.